Monday, January 24, 2011

Unicorns are real. Here is the photographic proof.

In my youth, I heard stories of the unicorn, magical beast of legend.  My grandmother would tell me fantastical tales of innocent ladies and noble, mythical steeds, and of their idyllic lives together in enchanted golden meadows.

Like most people, when I grew up I came to understand that there are no unicorns.  Perhaps, I thought, unicorns once roamed the Earth but had become extinct.  Maybe their habitat was destroyed by the spread of mankind, or perhaps they were hunted into extinction by the great cats.  For whatever reason, no unicorns survive today.

That's what I used to believe, before my week-long hike into the deep country, where I snapped THIS photograph of a unicorn in the wild.

Unaltered photograph of a unicorn

As you can see, not only do unicorns exist, but they can be found alive today.  This is not a hoax.

I remember stepping into the clearing.  At first, I couldn't believe my eyes.  My mind told me what my eyes were seeing was impossible.  But there it was, just as described by my grandmother so long ago.  The noble, passionate animal passed by not twenty yards from where I stood.  I could clearly make out its large, powerful body, its four hooved legs, and its trademark neck-hair, or "mane".    

I was so nervous I almost forgot to snap the picture.   

I have sent this photograph to major universities and journals of science, but thus far no one has responded and no one will return my phone calls.  I prayed that any delay was due to the rigorous examination that the photograph must be given in order to verify its authenticity.  I've come to suspect, though, that science doesn't want this truth to come out.  This evidence, they must know, will shake the foundations of human culture.  Academia, in concert with the government, is conspiring to keep the truth from you.    

This is why I've chosen to go public on the internet with this unicorn photograph.  After you've overcome your initial astonishment and had a chance to collect yourself, please share this news so we can bypass the cover-up.  Unicorns aren't myth.  Unicorns are real.  And they're just like my grandmother said.

--- Morning Cup O' Doom ---

More Ancient Mysteries - Myths & Legends *


  1. I hope this is some sort of joke blog post because if it isn't I just feel bad for you.

  2. Wow! That what an amazing shot. Thanks for providing this.

  3. That is definitely a real unicorn. Anyone can see that.

  4. Those who cannot see the unicorn probably are unable to see the emperor's new clothes, as well. Sad, that.

  5. You win the interwebz troll award!


  7. Every good unicornithologist knows that female and young unicorns often have no visible horn. Makes for a tough ID.

  8. How can someone not believe this?! It's right in front of our faces. Such an amazing photograph. Of course it's horn isn't visible; they retract back into their skulls when they are spotted by humans because they know humans would try to cut their horn off. Duh!

  9. Um that's a horse. I'm guessing you've never seen a horse before and you think that it's a unicorn. Congrats! Your the last person to discover the horse!

    1. Congratulations! You're the last person to realize that this is all a joke!

  10. Um that's a horse. I'm guessing you've never seen a horse before and you think that it's a unicorn. Congrats! Your the last person to discover the horse!


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